Mad Men: The Quality of Mercy

Pretty Much No Mercy

Sally's decided the best way to deal with her trainwreck of a dad is to go to boarding school, where she meets some classic Mean Girls and gets Glen to beat up a boy for her. Don catches Peggy and Ted at a matinee of Rosemary's Baby, so he tanks their pitch and tells Ted he's about as obvious as Joan in a string bikini. Peggy storms Don's office and calls him a monster, leading to Don ending the episode as he began it: drunk and in the fetal position. But, most importantly, Ken gets shot in the face (!) by the Chevy goons, so Pete takes over the account and has to work with Bob Benson, and we find out the truth about Bob Benson: he's basically a gay, Spanish-speaking Dick Whitman.

Poor Sally. This girl just wants a good parental role model. Now that her dad is out, she's going the Betty route. I love that they both have their ankles crossed the same way. Sally's going to be a terrifying mother if she doesn't get herself some therapy ASAP.

Sally's in yet another of her plaids, but the dress has a mod feel to it (and definitely a mod hemline). I'm going to miss this look when Sally starts adopting the hippie chic dress code at Miss Porter's Home for Daddy Issues.

It's nice to see that no matter what the decade, teenage girls will always be awful.

Mandy's fringed suede jacket is far out. Paired with the undone collar (in contrast with Millicent's buttoned-up neckline) there's no question who's the Queen Bee in this situation. However, they're no match for Sally. Sorry girls, but you cannot even begin to compete with the giant ball of messed up that is our girl Sally. In 10 years, she's going to be either the head of the Mafia or the most terrifying mother ever seen in Westchester.

Parents, this is the best reason not to send your girls to boarding school: they're so desperate for boys, they'll put out for Glen. GLEN.

He's really come a long way, hasn't he? From creepy boy begging for hair to sideburns and anti-war buttons artfully placed around his army jacket. He's still dead-eyed like a shark, but he's grown into himself nicely. As for the two Ms, it's pretty clear who's the Regina George and who's the Gretchen Weiners in this dynamic.

Also clear? That Peggy and Ted are majorly, totally, butt crazy in love.

More Stop Staring...

 Really, Peggy. When Joan's giving you this look, it's time to dial back the girlish giggles.

Even with the ill-advised love that cannot be, Peggy's been our style MVP this season. Gone are the awful secretarial outfits, banished are the ugly plaid dresses.

In their place are covet-worthy scooter dresses and covetable outerwear. Check out the fantastic lining on that coat!

Another great scooter dress, in a very un-Peggy color. It's almost more in Ted's color scheme.

And, of course, a giant scarf-like bow. Remember Joan's season 1 advice? Men love scarves. Oh, Peggy, this will not end well.

Last week Alyson suggested Peggy looked every bit the First Lady, in the best way possible. I'd definitely concur when it comes to this dress.

Who would have thought that the Peggy of the pilot would be consistently bringing it by late 1968? And, more importantly, who would have thought she'd be the one to call a spade a spade when it comes to Don — or, in this case, call a monster a monster?

It looks like we finally got our answer to the age-old question: "How many episodes does it take to get to the center of Bob Benson?"

The mystery may be solved, but our love for him and his impeccable taste has not waned. He's downright dashing in his green suit and colorful tie (which brings in all the major color themes from the season). And, as always, a striped shirt. The man is bold in life and in business wear. By the way, Matt Weiner, if you're looking for your next project since we're getting to the end of the 1960s, I would totally watch a show about Bob Benson and Manolo driving around the country in the 1970s scamming old women and being awesome.

Also, if you're reading, please don't kill off my imaginary boyfriend, Hunting Ken.

How adorable is Ken Cosgrove? I cannot believe he's become my favorite character, but he totally has. He's the one good guy in that whole damned office, and he can tap dance. He's got Kennedy good looks and charm. Actually, maybe that's why he's been taking it so hard this season — he's our Kennedy brothers stand-in.

Or, he was. Now he's the most baby-faced Bond villain ever.

I think we can all agree that Dr. Evil's Number Two took his style tips from Ken Cosgrove. It takes a certain kind of man to give a death stare with one eye, and Ken Cosgrove is that man.

Mad Men: Favors

You Owe Me Big Time!

Guys, I'm kind of anxious about how this season is going to wrap up. So many loose ends! For instance: Ted is mooning over Peggy while his own wife and kids sit around wondering when he's coming home for dinner. Pete frowns at everyone, but mostly his mother, who is Inconveniently Forgetful And Inappropriate. Also, Bob Benson is gay for Pete!? Bob, you could do better. Ted and Don butt heads over juice companies, Sally struggles with manipulative friendships while rebeling against Betty (who's looking pretty darn trim these days), Sylvia's son Mitchell is 1A for the draft and after Don strikes a deal to save Mitchell, Don and Sylvia have makeup/thankyou sex...and then Sally catches them in the act. Cue the very ominous cinematography as Don tries to explain (through a closed door) to Sally what he's done. We'll need more than two episodes to explain all that...

First of all, I need to give a shoutout to the prim and proper Betty Francis, who looks just as good as she did in season 1. She's never been much of a housewife, but boy can she dress the part! Helmet hair aside, she's back to Barbie status in a sweet yellow dress with a blue apron. And it's nice to see her angry again — Happy Betty is unsettling.

More Lotusgrace...

Sally is similarly sullen, but I'll blame that on the impending treacherous waters of Teenagedom. Also on the fact that she's still got a little-girl-in-plaid thing going on a lot of the time, despite those long, colt-ish legs. Don't worry, Sally — short-shorts are only a few years away from being in style!

But for now, Sally's still wearing ensembles which hearken back to previous episodes in previous seasons, when her wardrobe was comprised of strange upholstery-like patterns. These muddled colors are doing nothing for her, either.

This blue and red plaid is a little better for her complexion, I think, but no more grown up than the other outfits in this episode. Her friend Julie, however, is rocking green with flowers and white accents with a side pony (decades ahead of its time!) and a manipulative attitude. Ah, the frienemy...a timeless junior high accessory.

I mean, look at this Queen Bee. We met Julie earlier in the episode, in a fresh yellow and green minidress (also plaid, but much more age-appropriate in color and style) with a little pleated collar. Even her flirtatious smile and deceivingly low-maintenance hair scream "I KNOW I'M PRETTY." Mean Girl for sure.

Speaking of fresh colors, Peggy took a leaf out of Joanie's book and stepped into a lovely emerald green suit, with black trim to embolden the effort. Look at those sparkling eyes! She could be a First Lady in this look, no?

Mrs. Campbell is more akin to modern-day Queen Liz II than a First Lady, but I mean that as a compliment. Dementia-shmentia, she's the picture of poise in pale pink, which makes the bizarre things coming out of her mouth all the stranger. She mistakes Peggy for Trudy, brings up some awwwwwkward baby talk, and then explains her, um, close relationship with Manolo, her nurse. Peggy is effectively stunned.

Other ladies monochrome include everyone's favorite no-nonsense secretary, Dawn, in summery lime with an excellent ruffled/pintucked front. She could have gone classic with a black pencil skirt, but I'm appreciating this office-to-garden party vibe, courtesy of the slightly lighter colored skirt. She's ready for mimeographing and mint juleps!

Also keeping it simple but fun is our boy Bob Benson, who irritated the crap outta me in the beginning of the season, but for whom I now have sympathy feels. His tie is a fun splash of color against the boring World of Suits, and the neat stripes from his button down are also a welcome change. He's such a Nice Guy, you guys... but we all know that Nice Guys don't win on this show.

When you play the Game of Ads, you win, or you die. Or, rather, you drink and smoke yourself slowly to death.

Continuing in this metaphor...does this make Sally Draper the Arya Stark of Mad Men?

Yes. Yes, it does.

Mad Men: A Tale of Two Cities

Will it Float or Sink?

This week, the Mad Men and Women of Sterling Cooper & Partners (yes, we have a name!) continued navigating the shark-infested waters that surround them. Against company policy, Joan claimed a client for her own and was nearly sent back to the kiddie pool, until Peggy helped Joan swim with the big boys. Pete tried to keep things afloat at the firm, despite Jim (and Ted's? His motives are unclear) subverse efforts to drown the "other half" of the company. Meanwhile, Don literally floated face down in a pool after over-indulging at an LA party. Roger to the rescue! Who knew that behind that yachting getup was an honest-to-goodness lifeguard?

Joan made some bold career decisions and paired them with a fresh summer print and soft cuts. Appropriate, considering she thought she was on a date, not a client call. At any rate, it's so refreshing to see patterns on Joanie. Girlfriend demands to be noticed in this ensemble.

More Bottega Veneta...

 

But we all have our security blankets, and when Joan and Peggy meet with Avon, Joan reverts back to monochrome and tailored cuts in this lovely yet all-business suit. And naturally, she's got her new accessory bestie — the bright gold broach.

We've been harsh on Peggy ever since she came back to the SCDP SCDPCGC SC&P offices, but I absolutely love this Ralph Lauren-inspired blazer. It's stylish yet executive, slightly flashy yet resigned. Attagirl, Pegs. Knew you could do it.

While the girls were romancing clients, the boys were out on the Best Coast. It's cute that they tried to dress in a geographically-appropriate manner, but New York habits die hard, with Don in a stiff (albiet light-colored) suit, and Roger in...is that...yachting attire? He and Peggy must shop at the same Ralph Lauren.

But wait, who's in the car?

Harry! Talk about embracing location! That hair, those aviators, that RED JACKET. Remember when Harry was kind of a shy nerd in earlier seasons? Not anymore! See what a little fashion upgrade can do to a guy's self-esteem?

There's always money in the banana stand. Yes, the color explosion continues with this punchy yellow jacket...and that scarf! I seriously want to go to work dressed like this, but unfortunately, I am not as brave as Harry Crane.

I know I was a bit harsh on Don a few pictures ago. I mean, he looks GREAT, it's just...he always does. Change it up, fella, try for something a little new — you know you'll still look dashing.

But the more I look at Roger's ascot, the more I applaud him. It takes balls to dress like Thurston Howell when you're surrounded by counterculture. Speaking of...

Holy Sonny & Cher, it's Danny! The talent-less copywriter from seasons yore has reimerged, hanging with an LA beach bunny and Danny McBride's father. BTW, I want Danny's shirt RIGHT THIS INSTANT. I will wear it with Harry Crane's banana jacket and you can't stop me.

Roger tries to steal Danny's girl, who isn't saying much through her drug-induced haze. Upon a closer look, she's less of a beach babe and more into Cher's Native-American vibe. Also, it looks like she's taken the Advanced Layering class at the Vanessa Abrams School of Accessorizing. A+, dear.

Alone with Lotus, Roger tries a thing or two, and that results in...

BAM! "I'm better dressed for this party than you are!"

So where's Don during all of this? He's with the happenin' hippies around the hookah pipe. Peep the white gladiator sandles on Random Hippie Chick, at left. Dick Whitman is ready to conquer Rome.

"Groovy."

"Until I start hallucinating that I'm making out with the party hostess (who totally looks like my ex-wife) and then my current wife shows up in a hippie outfit, and tells me she's pregnant (no, I don't have mommy issues, why do you ask?)"

"AND THEN! Some soldier I met in Hawaii (and served as his replacement Best Man) also shows up, except he's now dead, and I almost drown in a pool and...yeah."

"I'm gonna stick to old fashioned Old Fashioneds from now on, thanks though."

So that was fun, and now we're back at the office and the inevitable shades of gray within. The most interesting thing here are those really cool orange chairs.

Although we do get some nice tie action, courtesy of Ted and Pete. Which one do you like better? Throwing out the fact that Pete's is laughably short, that is.

Wait, Pete! Don't get upset! I like your tie!

"I don't care about anything anymore, well, except for one thing...or two..."

Pete, it's like you don't even watch this show. Didn't you see what happened to Don? Didn't we learn to Just Say No?

PS: Remember making tie-dye shirts as a kid? Why did we stop doing that? I think I just found my weekend project...

Mad Men: The Better Half

Back to Reality

Phew! After last week's dizzying ep, I have to say, I was a little nervous about this one. Turns out there was nothing to worry about as we've landed back on solid Manhattan asphalt. Peggy is caught between Don and Ted, and also Ted and Abe — at least until she stabs Abe with a freaking spear! Megan feels like Don is drifting (quelle surprise), and he does, right into the arms (i.e. shorts) of his newly downsized ex-wife, Betty. We also see Roger trying to be a loving grandfather/father, but being epically rejected by both his daughter and Joan, respectively.

We open in a meeting about margarine, and Ted decides that he'll throw is support behind it by wearing a shirt of the same color. Also, he's wearing his tie like a cape — that can't be comfortable, right? Judging by the condition of Harry's shirt, he seems to be waging a war against his iron.

And why is his tie so wrinkled? There is a major lack of irons/steamers in the Crane household.

Peggy's pissed that she keeps getting put in the middle of creative differences between Don and Ted. I'd be upset, too, if I was wearing a potato sack.

As soon as she gets home she takes of the cape and we finally see some shape. I actually love this dress, especially the contrasting color inside the pleat, but maybe next time we leave the matchy-matchy topper at home, 'k Pegs?

Meanwhile, Megan is playing her character Corinne's twin sister Collette (god, soaps are fantastic), in a killer red crocheted jumpsuit. No one else could actually pull this look of but Megan.

Arlene's charachters tangerine tunic is pretty awesome, too, with that gold beading. Maybe something you could even wear to the beach today (minus the humongous brooch, obvs). These are some rich soap opera bitches.

Off duty Megan's outfit is totes something I wear daily, but don't look nearly as chic doing so.

Hey Don, your wife's hot even in a basic tank and jeans, stop screwing around on her! And while you're at it, buy a new tie!

Speaking of women Don's strung along, here's Betty looking fab at a fancy black tie soiree. It seems as though Betty did indeed managed to "reduce", and draw the attention of many a sleazy tuxedoed man.

The detailing on this gown is magnificent — it even continues around the back. The accessorizing is pretty great too, with that bejeweled hair clip and amazing gold clutch. I really wish I could have gotten a better snap of it, but she was hanging out in a dimly-lit hallway. I've never been much for pearls or evening gloves, but I'd say a solid 8 out of 10, Mrs. Francis.

Back at the SCDPCGC offices (ugh, I hope they come up with a name soon), Peggy is rocking some nautical colors in this little number. I actually think this is my favorite Peggy look to date. The fit is amazing and the mix of pattern and color is perfect. Finally, something age appropriate for the Peggster.

It only seems appropriate that Ted declares his love for his protege while she's donning this outfit. I have to say, I'm actually kind of digging Ted's suit. It's nice to see a man who's not afraid of color.

Joan, as always, is a vision in purple. This truly is her color. 

The bow and pleat detailing on the waist is a nice touch. This whole dress just looks really well made, you know? And is it me, or does Pete's waistcoat look a little small? It's pulling at all of the buttons. Maybe time to cut back on the booze and dinners out a bit, eh Pete?

Roger's daughter, Margaret, dons a really sweet dress to drop off her son with Grandpa Roger. Little does she know that Roger will take her 4 year old son to see Planet of the Apes. "Don took his kid to see it," Roger defends. Hey, guess what, Roger: Don's son is 11 years old...

Anyway, I wish I could have gotten a nice full-length picture of this dress, because the pattern is really elaborate and interesting. I think this would totally work today — pastels are in, my friends! 

Focusing his guilt on another one of his children, Roger pops up over at Joanie's apartment with a gift for Kevin, their adorable little love child. I love how all of the male characters have weekend attire that mainly consists of patterned blazers as opposed to their solid, formal work jackets. Like, "Look at me in my plaid blazer! I'm fun, casual Roger!" 

I think Bob may be the exception. Joan's new BFF (or possible BF??) is rocking some short shorts here, with a matching polo shirt. It takes some pretty big grapes to wear an outfit like this, Bob Benson.

Joan's beach wear is perfection. Like Peggy earlier on, she's working the nautical trend (notice the little ship's wheel (helm?) on the zip?) and the head scarf is so casually cool. Joan looks great with her hair down. Side note: this episode has quite a few headbands/scarfs, and you know how we love that around the YKYLF staff room!

Weekend Don is basically the same as weekday Don, but with rolled up sleeves and those sunglasses that I still want.

But whoa...where did this Betty come from? Looking every bit the sexy soccer mom in her jean shorts and floral blouse, she decides to follow Don up to Baobby's summer camp. She even seems happy. Betty. Happy. Just let that sink in for a minute.

More BCBGMAXAZRIA...

I just slept with your wife, heh. Yeah, this is awkward, and not only because Henry is wearing a jacket in the same fabric that used to cover my grandmothers sofa.

Betty looks happy (again?!) and sweet in this patterned frock with a crisp white headband (!!). I'd be happy too if I could sleep with Don and not have to deal with all of the drama.

Little does poor, sweet Megan know what's happening at camp when Arlene comes over to give some advice, and take another swipe at swinging with Megs.

Megan's head scarf (!!) matches her tank beautifully, but I can't say that I particularly like the outfit. No, it's just that top. It doesn't really do anything for her. The scarf and jeans are fine, though I think Megan needs to go back to dressing a bit younger. Arlene is a hot mess in this green curtain, but I want that gold bag almost as much as I want Don's sunglasses.

Arlene, take note — this is how you wear green. Joan keeps her accessories minimal with her now trademark brooch (in lieu of her pen necklace), and her demeanor cool when Roger asks for a chance to bond with his son. 

Sorry, Roger. Though you can be counted on to look sharp in a 3-piece suit, you can't be relied on when it comes to your family. Burn. 

Peggy returns from an eventful weekend of cowering in her apartment, accidently stabbing her boyfriend with a homemade spear, and a subsequent trip to the ER (you know, the usz) in a mint green polka-dotted number with a scarf neckline. 

Another win for Peggy, but only from the neck down. Her hair and makeup are a big sad, as is her personal life — Abe dumped her (not for stabbing him in the stomach, but rather, for not being hipster enough), and Ted had zero reaction to the news that his crush is newly single.

Poor Peggy. Poor Megan. Poor Roger (though that's his own fault). Seems as though the only people on the ups this week are Joan (finally!) and Betty. Who would have thought?

Mad Men: The Crash

Everybody Must Get Stoned

Guys, this may have been the most ridiculous episode to date. Except that time when Roger Sterling dropped acid. To review: Ken almost gets into an accident after being taken for a joy ride, Gleason passes away and no one is sure if they even liked him, and half the office gets tripped out on speed. On the romance front, Peggy and Stan finally share a super magical smooch, Sylvia finally tells Don what's up, Don has freaky flashbacks, and we discover how he lost his v-card. PLUS! Crazy Grandma Ida (who's not really the kids grandma) shows up, Betty gets so mad she almost pops a vein, and Don still continues to get away with everything. Also — no one gets any work done.

So remember that one day when a doctor came to the office and injected everyone with an "energy serum" and everyone went batshit cray like whoa? LOL. That was good times.

Nice tie Don, though I'm sure the doc's getting an even nicer view of your nether regions. Too bad we don't get the same treatment.

Post-injections, everyone started flying around the office. Like this:

White boy can jump! And in such a nicely tailored outfit! Digging the green and grey combo and loving those pointed shoes hard core. Don should take a huge cue from Stan here. Stan looks super stylish (which is somewhat of a change from his usual shlubby attire) and still manages to stick the landing.

And then Ken does a tap dance worthy of being on So You Think You Can Dance.

Meh to the suit, though I do like the color. Double meh to both Don and Ken's shoes. But double thumbs up to Ken's cane! With that fantastic accessory plus his superb dancing skills, he's def got a little Gene Kelly thing going on. Me likey.

While Ken was dancing, Don his boost to use by stalking his lover. Who is soooo over him. I mean, so over him. Doesn't he know that before she was Sylvia, she was Lauren on Boy Meets World and almost came between Corey and Topanga? Anyone who threatens that relationship should not be messed with. Especially if she is still dressed in her housecoat and kerchief after 10am.

Although upon reviewing her ho-hum afternoon outfit, I think I prefer the housecoat.

At any rate, she's definitely not to be messed with whilst wearing a ring big enough to knock Don and anyone else within a 3 mile radius out cold.

And oh, hey! Don has anger issues of his own. I think this was pre-speed, but this episode was so trippy that I honestly can't remember.

But what is the source of his anger? Is it really because Sylvia dumped him, or is it because his daughter is starting to work street corners? Or perhaps because his alimony payments are being used to pay for his ex-wife's awful hair stylist? I mean, all of that would make me furious, too.

For serious though, I do think Sally looks adorbs. Her skirt may be a tad short, but it's got a great pattern, and I approve of the Waldorf-esque headband. So age and time period appropriate.

The Draper-Francis girls (and Sylvia) may have been lackluster, but Peggy really brought it this week. Check out this shapely sherbet-orange (season 5 reference!) dress with double-breasted buttons. I kind of hate the mock turtleneck, but other than that, this is a dress I would actually consider wearing.

That hair, tho. Is it her real coif, or did she steal some biker dude's helmet?

Or a train conductor's hat? Snaps on the rest of her funeral outfit. Showing a bit of leg, sporting a cute jacket, wearing the perfect LBD...I give it 9s all around.

More Calvin Klein...

 

And she's accessorizing with an elegant scarf and a serious scowl.

DO NOT MESS with Peggy's creative process. She has no time for your speed.

Or your William Tell-type stunts. Have we learned nothing from the middle ages?

Is it just me or is there something a little sexy about Stan in a rumpled, untucked shirt with a cig hanging from his mouth, about to be shot with an X-Acto knife?

Guess it's not just me. Peggy wants a piece of that too!

Totes fine Peggster, he's all yours.

Except perhaps you were better off with Ted. I mean, he definitely knows how to color coordinate the shizz out of an outfit. This fantastic green number almost makes me forget that his jacket looks like one of Mr. Roger's sweaters on steroids.

And I'm pretty sure he won't kiss you and then go shtup some hippie girl. He's got a little more class.

And look! Here is said hippie girl, Wendy, aka daughter of the recently departed Gleason. She completely reminded me of Sam from Now and Then after she got pulled out of the sewer. Who I loved. I also love this girls spunk, and her mis-matched colors and patterns. It's so off it absolutely works.

So while Don was busy having soft porno flashbacks, Megan was at home getting all dolled up in a sexy gogo girl costume from my local Halloween shop.

You know, I think I may dislike this so much I've started to like it. It works for a night out at the theater, while your stepdaughter minds your apartment (and her two little brothers) on her own.

Sally stumbles out of her bedroom in this absolutely amazing two piece pajama set. It's a little sweet and sassy, yet still cute enough to make her not look like she's catapulting into adulthood too soon.

But Sally, I thought you were a smart gal? How could you, Sally Draper, the product of super stylish Don and Betty Draper, think someone wearing a dress that doesn't fit, a trench that is cut longer than the dress, and with hair this wild & crazy could be your grandma? I just can't.

Right, so, Grandma Ida is not Don's surrogate mother. She's just a very clever cat burgler who can't dress. Of course, it would help if Sally actually knew something about her father's past so that she wasn't so easily duped, but parenting is hard n' stuff.

Right? I mean, why talk it out when you can just yell!

Or faceplant in your living room from the sheer overwhelming-ness of it all.

Our thoughts exactly, Don. Shhh. You rest now.

The next day, Don seems to have sobered up both literally and figuratively — turns out his back hallway doings led to the unlocked door that was an open invitation for Grandma Ida to rob the place, and so now, he's too "busy" to notice the canary that threw up on Sylvia.

Cue the most awkward elevator ride ever. This scenario right here? This is why you don't shit where you eat, Don.

All-in-all, I spent this entire episode with a finger on the rewind button, and my head cocked in perpetual confusion. But if anything, I think we can agree we all experienced that 60s feel-good vibe. Hopefully next week is back to normal, and we see more of Joan, because she would not have tolerated this week's shenanigans.